More Funny Quotes

I guess I just couldn’t get enough of writers dry humor, so here is another list of (hilarious) quotes by some (hilarious) writers.

Long, hard slog today writing the Great American Tweet.
(That was it…what do you think? Pulitzer?)
– Greg Tamblyn

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs.
– Christopher Hampton

As far as I’m concerned, “whom” is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler.
– Calvin Trillin

Listen up, Internet: there is no “h” in “wacky.” Got that? THERE IS NO “H” IN “WACKY.” Thank you.
– Dave Barry

Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications.
– Fran Lebowitz

Writing is a socially acceptable form of getting naked in public.
– Paulo Coelho

There’s not much to be said about the period except that most writers don’t reach it soon enough.
– William Zinsser

Never, ever use repetitive redundancies. Don’t use no double negatives. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
– William Safire

Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial “we.”
– Mark Twain

Well if you aren’t convinced now, there is no hope for you.

Share and comment below!

Finding That Sweet Inspiration

Another one of those hard hurdles for any writer: how to find inspiration when the ideas just won’t flow. Some writers believe that as soon as you start to lose inward inspiration, than that is the end of the line my friend. But it doesn’t have to be that way. I have never personally experience a time when I wasn’t inspired in my personal writing, but I understand that it is a struggle and that it’s hard to get back in the groove. I found this article by Leo Babauta with a huge list of ideas on where to search for inspiration. If this won’t help you then…. Well, it will help you. Don’t despair!!

 

http://writetodone.com/31-ways-to-find-inspiration-for-your-writing/

 

Did this help you? Share your experience below!!

Writers Can Be Funny Too

I myself love humor, especially when I can connect to it on deeper level. Just kidding, I love a good joke any day, deep meaning be slugged. Writers, as you may not have been aware of, are capable of some pretty decent humor. Don’t believe me? Well I counter you with these…

From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.
– Winston Churchill

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.” Douglas Adams

I wrote a few children’s books. Not on purpose.
– Steven Wright

If Moses were alive today he’d come down from the mountain with the Ten Commandments and spend the next five years trying to get them published.
– Anonymous

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.
– Doug Larson

I was sorry to hear my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I am not feeling very well myself.
– Mark Twain

The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering.
– Tom Waits

An autobiography usually reveals nothing bad about its writer except his memory.
– Franklin P. Jones

Take that, all you doubters in the funniness of writers! Obviously I am not a great one since I just said ‘doubters in the funniness of writers’, but I’m getting there!

 

I feel like I’m forgetting something…….

 

Motivate Me

Almost every writer I know has struggled at one point with motivation. Even rereading that word sends a shiver down my spine. The dreaded demotivation has caused many a writer to bang their heads against the wall in frustration. What do you do when you feel your livelihood is at stake and the words don’t come? Well my fellow writers, fear not! Here are some tips and tricks on working your way through the sea of demotivation and into the land of productivity.

As always, here is a link to an expert with lots to say on this subject.

http://writetodone.com/motivation-tips-that-actually-work-6-sure-fire-ways-to-get-writing-and-keep-writing/

Don’t forget to comment below!

Quotes, Quotes, and ….. Quotes!

So, I wanted to take some time and share some writing advice from great (my opinion) authors.

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” – Maya Angelou

“If there’s a book that you want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it.”

– Toni Morrison

“Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.” – Anton Chekov

“Protect the time and space in which you write. Keep everybody away from it, even the people who are most important to you.” — Zadie Smith

“Always carry a note-book. And I mean always. The short-term memory only retains information for three minutes; unless it is committed to paper you can lose an idea for ever.” — Will Self

“Listen to the criticisms and preferences of your trusted ‘first readers.'” — Rose Tremain

“The reader is a friend, not an adversary, not a spectator.” — Jonathan Franzen

“Keep your exclamation points under control. You are allowed no more than two or three per 100,000 words of prose. If you have the knack of playing with exclaimers the way Tom Wolfe does, you can throw them in by the handful.” — Elmore Leonard

“The nearest I have to a rule is a Post-it on the wall in front of my desk saying ‘Faire et se taire’ (Flaubert), which I translate for myself as ‘Shut up and get on with it.’” — Helen Simpson

 “In the planning stage of a book, don’t plan the ending. It has to be earned by all that will go before it.” — Rose Tremain

 

What is your favorite? Do you have other favorite quotes? Comment below!

Self-Publishing: Nightmare or God Send?

Some writers tend to freak out when they hear these words: Self-publishing. Honestly, self-publishing seems like a huge feat for any writer, but it is actually easier than it sounds. Don’t mistake me, it does take a lot of work and time to put together a project like this and publish it on your own. But it is doable. In fact, many self-published books and projects are quite successful.

There are a few different reasons to take the self-publishing route. One being that some writers do not want to deal with getting an agent, finding a publishing company, and dealing with the steps to publish through them. Others like to be able to make all of their own decisions through the whole process, where if you are working with a publishing company there are certain things they decide on themselves. Others just enjoy the process of self-publishing their books and wouldn’t give it up any day.

Here is a blog post by Nathan Bransford, a self-published author and blogger.

 

http://blog.nathanbransford.com/2013/12/self-publishing-was-way-easier-than-i.html

 

Any thoughts or questions? Post your comments below!

Creative Writing vs Professional Writing: Why are they different?

There are so many different ways to make a career as a writer. Many a writer has created a great career for themselves, however not all writers have similar career paths. The two biggest categories in writing are creative and professional. They may seem similar in many ways, but creative and professional writing are entirely different. In some ways, you need to have different mind sets to be successful in each field. The creative side of writing is just that, a creative use of the English language geared towards a certain audience. It is an art form, if you will. Professional writing is a more technical approach to writing. It is advertisement, editing, and journalism, to name a few.

Here are a few thoughts from Angelo Lornezo, a writer and journalist, who has seen both sides of the spectrum and can give us some insight on what exactly are the differences between the two sides.

 

http://thoughtcatalog.com/angelo-lorenzo/2014/08/truth-and-creativity-journalism-vs-creative-writing/

What I like most about this, is that no one is required to pick one type of writing and stick with it. That is the beauty of the writing community, you are not stuck in one place if you don’t want to be.

I would love to hear other stories from writers about their experience working with both types of writing! Comment below!